Dale Carnegie knew what it took to build solid relationships and he never wrote an email

In 1936 Dale Carnegie published “How to Win Friends and Influence People” and it is still a true classic today and for days to come.  I was first introduced to the Dale Carnegie methods by my brother David while I was in high school.  David can sell ice to an Eskimo and is always very personable and I always admired that.  During high school and college David kept on sharing Dale Carnegie’s advice and methods with me and kept encouraging me to read the book.  So finally I decided to buy the book right after my college graduation.  I remember being on the Greyhound and heading up to Detroit and I could not put the book down.  Although Dale Carnegie wrote about everything our parents taught us while growing up he takes it to the business world and explains how to develop meaningful and fruitful relationships.

We have all been in those situations where we see an acquaintance in a public area and we are not sure if we should go up and say hello.  The thought crosses our mind of “maybe he doesn’t want to say hi to me”, “he won’t remember me”,  “he is more successful than me why would he want to talk with me”, or my favorite “I’ll just pretend I didn’t see him”.  But everyone loves to be said hi too.  Stick out your hand and say hello they won’t get mad at you and it can truly do wonders for you.  I can’t tell you how many quality business relationships I have created by just going up to someone and saying hello.  To be successful you have to work with people and really get to know them.  The only way to do that is to talk with them and continue the relationship.  Dale Carnegie says that the sweetest sound to everyone is their own name.  The best way to remember someone’s name is to look them straight in the eye and repeat it to them after you meet them.

So how does technology compete with Dale Carnegie?  My theory is simple – make a call instead of sending an email, take someone to lunch instead of sending them a e-greeting, go up and say hello to someone instead of texting or tweeting then.  Although I believe in technology and I nurture it I don’t believe it can be more meaningful than a personal touch.  I am still a true believer in the basics of relationships – Put your hand out and shake the hand of the individual across from you.  But keep in mind that technology can help offset the personal touches and continue to improve the professional relationships.  Oftentimes I will be stuck at a traffic light and will think about a client or an old friend.  I will then send them a quick text, before the light turns green, wishing them a nice day.  I may read an article about a client and then send it to them via email.  Use a good balance of personal touches and technology and your relationships will grow.